Out Of Service

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I sit in the living room trying to write about sex, put on my laptop and start to squeeze my brain and think about what to put down in this word document, what turns me on, because as gya said, “if it doesn’t make you wet, then it’s not good” so here I’m trying to figure out what turns me on.

I sit there, light my cigarette and start to break down the words related to sex, women, a woman, her body, turn on, holding. Then get distracted by my brother passing by, I look at the laptop and try to see what I want to touch, look away and still try to break down sex and I stop.

Picture is the other thing I can do for Bekhsoos, I think of her neck, and I put it in  a frame in my mind, I google, I get a picture, a woman’s tummy, that’s what turns me on about of her, and get distracted by an sms, I go back and look at the picture and think about that neck, that tummy, and I stop.

Photoshop, I will tell you a secret bayni w baynik, file, new, check size, can’t still figure it out after all the new that I have made on this Photoshop. And I stare at the white layer, and I try to bring to the fore my emotions, my sex secret and then maybe that will turn me on to write. And I look at it, tool text, click, and type “nothing is turning me on these days.”

File, save, attach, and submit.

abdo al raQissa

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