You Are My TV Show

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You are my TV show.

You are that first kiss I have seen.

I will never forget that first kiss.

I will never forget that second

When you pulled from that kiss,

Just to take a breath and sigh

When the need to breathe interrupts you.

You and her are my TV show.

I watched you for years.

I Just wished you would realize it.

That, that kiss,

Your need to be so close,

To the extent that makes you forget to breathe

Is what you are waiting for

You are missing out on life

By breathing too much

Being on your toes,

Stop breathing, let go

It will make you feel alive.

You grow up watching TV shows and movies and you love it when you see that lesbian couple that will make you dream for a while after watching them every time, and you go from thinking you will be alone for the rest of your life, to letting yourself dream, imagine and go from hopeless to hopeful.

When I was 15 and discovering my sexuality, Willow and Tara had their first kiss. And of course, your first encounter with lesbians on TV always leaves a trace in your heart that you carry with you till you have your own lesbian “love,” “kiss,” or “sex”.

I never got over it, and until now every time I see that kiss on “Once and Again” between Katie and Jesse, it still makes my heart beat the same way, why? Maybe because I’m a hopeless romantic or maybe this is still the thing I’m looking for. Regardless of what it is, it is still something that puts a smile on my face and something I long for.

What is more awesome is when you see that happen right in front of you in real life, two people finding the attraction, looking for the words to make each other laugh, connecting in a way that makes them disconnect from the rest of the world.

This happens. It is not only in the fiction world, making me think about the way we go after the girl, and all that trouble that you push yourself to go through and that people push you to do. To get the girl you don’t need to impress her with your words, you don’t need to get her that book that she would be happy with, or make her that playlist that you love and you know she will admire your taste of music because of it.

You need that spark that will make her give you the attention that you want, which will make life much easier for you. That spark that will make her change her playlist to listen to music that will remind her of you. The spark that will make you see her and hear her in that song that you didn’t relate to before.

Attraction is so tricky because it comes out of nowhere, and one can never fight it. Attraction doesn’t always lead to love. Just as getting along with someone, and laughing with someone, and being able to spend endless hours with someone while talking about anything and everything, also do not lead to love.

Love, Money, Music, Talking, Sex to me is not enough, but attraction is enough for you to let go, to stop breathing for a second and just give in to that need of comfort that someone else’s lips body warmth would give you.

abdo al raQissa

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